Caption Contest #296

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. A second date? OK. You are starting to grow on me.
9. I swear I wasn't looking up!
8. Sorry Ms. Hayes but Mr. Juran said no to a sequel.
7. A ring? Just let me get my spare tire and I'll propose to you right now.
6. No, that dress does not make you look big.
5. I said "Brobdingnag" not "Your bra's big, Nag!"
4. I just don't date any woman over fifty...feet.
3. I've got a cousin Gulliver who would love to meet you.
2. Why don't you put me back in my Micro-Machine and we'll pretend this never happened.
1. Lilliput me down.

Caption Contest #295

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. This one put up the best fight.
9. Going extinct, yes, but interestingly not on the endangered list.
8. Actually, the taxidermy cost me an arm race and a leg.
7. The story behind this one is riveting.
6. To be honest, she was the easiest to track.
5. In some cultures, the turret is ground and put in a soup.
4. You should see the Predator Drone mounted in the washroom.
3. Like you'd expect, tastes like chicken.
2. There we were, eyeball-to-turret.
1. I think this one was a male.

Caption Contest #294

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. We all use new laptops, but Kurt loves his oversized desktop.
9. Psst--Don't look him in the eye.
8. It wasn't the raise he was looking for.
7. Well, he's got big shoes to fill.
6. Frank was tired of people stealing all his pens.
5. Don't worry, he's not as tall in person.
4. The Stiltwalker King will see you now.
3. I'll be right back with a highchair.
2. He'll be down in a minute.
1. On the weekends, he's a tennis referee.

Caption Contest #293

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. What if Guinness doesn't validate this as the world's largest block of Swiss Cheese?
9. So you know how you always say you can take a good joke?
8. I thought she said the real treasure was in the dessert.
7. Can't you just plant Sequoia seeds?
6. Excuse me, is this part of the new Christo exhibit?
5. Don't worry. Twenty-seventh time's a charm.
4. You're in the lead, but be careful. Barry just broke the sewer main.
3. So this is where you're going to fake the moon landing?
2. I don't think this will teach Goliath's dog a lesson.
1. Your wife says never mind, they were on the dresser.

Caption Contest #292

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. That's Carl and Cindy--always looking down on us.
9. So much for "spacious skies."
8. Dammit, Martha, this cul-de-sac used to have privacy.
7. Looks like it's about to rain Kates and Dougs.
6. Why are the Millers always coming over unannounced?
5. Relax, they're Australian.
4. That cloud looks just like the Hendersons.
3. Gladys, what kind of mushrooms did you put in the salad?
2. Why you gotta be all up in my grill?
1. Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?

Caption Contest #291

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com)

10. Today's doubleheader features a knight game.
9. With Lancelot's unique one-handed swing, pitchers tend to pitch inside.
8. In the minors, he was a switch jouster.
7. Dragon, the team's ace, is a real flamethrower.
6. Ye Oldtimers' Day is always a fan favorite at this ballpark.
5. Santiago's swing has looked a little rusty lately.
4. Today's elbow pads are bigger than they were in ye olde days.
3. This is Miller's first post-season appearance since 1132.
2. Frankly, I don't care for the old uniforms.
1. The Templars are hoping to break their three-game losing streak.