Caption Contest #308

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com.)

10. I can’t help myself. I’ve got a sweet saber-tooth.
9. If our clan keeps eating these, we’ll never get anywhere.
8. Stale or not, these donuts are delicious.
7. Despite what they say, I’m glad you re-invented the donut.
6. Let me tell you my theory about natural selection before I have a heart atta--
5. I bet in some alternate universe, donuts are smaller and the women get pregnant.
4. My favorite are still the Pangea Cream-filled.
3. I’m all for hiding evidence, but maybe we should have thrown everything in the tar pit.
2. How are we ever gonna get the rest of these home?
1. I could use a pterodactyl-sized antacid right about now.

Caption Contest #307

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com.)

10. White people. They all taste the same.
9. Just stop it with the crocodile tears.
8. What did Jacques mean when he said he wanted to have us for dinner?
7. “See you later, Larry.” “After a while, Craig.”
6. You’d think they’ve never seen colored folk before.
5. It’s an alligator eat alligator world.
4. Shhh…I think they might be Seminole fans.
3. Shoot, this is the express! We missed our swamp.
2. Now that we’re here, I want to eat that Jared guy first.
1. There had better be other people in costume at this party.

Caption Contest #306

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com.)

10. The Hendersons have taken in-home gardening to a new level.
9. Honey, when was the last time you mowed the carpet?
8. “I may be bald,” said Richard. “But--word is born--I can still grow corn rows.”
7. Since the governor passed de-criminalization legislation, the Smiths started growing grass in their home again.
6. The stalks were hung by the Shipleys with care…
5. Suddenly the genie granted the third wish, that all the world had access to free food.
4. In this haunted house, even the floor has ears.
3. How about next we to go to the kitchen and watch the paint dry?
2. Now it’s down to two. And the winner is exempt from this week’s elimination.
1. I can’t wait until the harvest when I can watch TV again.

Caption Contest #305

(above image courtesy of newyorker.com.)

10. We lost funding from NIH. But NIMH is gonna love us.
9. No, it’s the Peromyscus Arthurus, after me!
8. Well, Paul, you said we were gonna hit it big.
7. Look out, here comes that cat again!
6. Please tell me that quantity of growth hormones is at the lethal dose.
5. Does anyone else think it looks a little too Walt, but not enough Disney?
4. What would Rick Moranis do?
3. Oh my God! He ate Dumbledore!
2. ‘Don’t push the red button,’ I said. But noooo…
1. OK, now are they too big to fail?